- Joined
- Mar 3, 2004
- Messages
- 1,092
- Reaction score
- 1,708
I hate it when people tell me I'm hard to buy gifts for. I mean I am old and don't want much and pretty much buy the few small things I do, so they may have a point.
So recognizing that I will often give the few people in my life I have failed to alienate past the point of gift giving closeness, a very short list of very inexpensive items that might amuse me.
Then the fuckers fuck that simple task up. On christmass I got to open up the same gift twice and then be told it was somehow my fault for giving the same list 2 my wife and mom thinking they might coordinate. this year I am going to formally register as if I'm getting married so the store's website will show what has already been bought.
Another instance, I have become dedicated to going to the gym again, but every T shirt and all my sweat pants I have are either black or gray. So i end up looking like this
or
So I ask for Champion xl sweats in bright colors AND I SEND THE AMAZON LINK.
Today I am sitting in the black pair of off brand sweats that my mother in law bought me. She was kind enough to buy a 2nd pair, gray. The off brand sweats are great, vastly superior to the ones I asked for because-
A- they have giant cargo pockets on them, I mean nothing says I am ready for an explosive work out than pockets stuff full of electronics and my wallet.
B- Might be made for women as they sit very low on my hips giving the gym access to great ass cleavage shots when I squat, or dead lift or lean over the water fountain for a drink, or breathe air.
C- Make up for being low slung by being very short in the legs, should the gym flood I am going to be laughing at all the regular fitting sweat pants wearers and their soggy ankles.
D- Have drawstrings made out of a kind of glossy fabric that likes to come undone under the mildest strain, so things like blinking and swallowing saliva tend to loosen them with the bonus of even more ass cleavage being shown.
So then I begin to suspect it was intentional, which makes me an asshole right? BUT I MEAN I SENT THE FUCKING LINK.
So recognizing that I will often give the few people in my life I have failed to alienate past the point of gift giving closeness, a very short list of very inexpensive items that might amuse me.
Then the fuckers fuck that simple task up. On christmass I got to open up the same gift twice and then be told it was somehow my fault for giving the same list 2 my wife and mom thinking they might coordinate. this year I am going to formally register as if I'm getting married so the store's website will show what has already been bought.
Another instance, I have become dedicated to going to the gym again, but every T shirt and all my sweat pants I have are either black or gray. So i end up looking like this
or So I ask for Champion xl sweats in bright colors AND I SEND THE AMAZON LINK.
Today I am sitting in the black pair of off brand sweats that my mother in law bought me. She was kind enough to buy a 2nd pair, gray. The off brand sweats are great, vastly superior to the ones I asked for because-
A- they have giant cargo pockets on them, I mean nothing says I am ready for an explosive work out than pockets stuff full of electronics and my wallet.
B- Might be made for women as they sit very low on my hips giving the gym access to great ass cleavage shots when I squat, or dead lift or lean over the water fountain for a drink, or breathe air.
C- Make up for being low slung by being very short in the legs, should the gym flood I am going to be laughing at all the regular fitting sweat pants wearers and their soggy ankles.
D- Have drawstrings made out of a kind of glossy fabric that likes to come undone under the mildest strain, so things like blinking and swallowing saliva tend to loosen them with the bonus of even more ass cleavage being shown.
So then I begin to suspect it was intentional, which makes me an asshole right? BUT I MEAN I SENT THE FUCKING LINK.
